In my last post, I mentioned how important is to be who you truly are. There’s no time left for falsities; we know where that is taking us. And in this culture of fast-food, laser hair removal, fake smiles, and social lies and deceit, we are at a crucial turning point. We can destroy ourselves through our own self-hatred, or we can choose to be who we truly are. It’s an empowering and terrifying time, is it not? Can you feel it? Can you feel that inner call resonating with these words yelling and screaming, “Yes, I want to be who I truly am. Yes! Yes! Yes!”

So get started.

Facing Your Lies, No Longer Blaming Others

There’s a juncture on this path where we no longer blame society, our parents, or our situations. We turn the finger back towards ourselves. We turn to look into the mirror to face our greatest liar–it’s an important turning point. The world cannot give us what we want. What we truly want is to be ourselves. We try to lie to ourselves saying that the world won’t let us. But that isn’t true. I’m sure all of you have obstacles. That’s fine. And if you’re reading this I want you to know that you are perfectly suited to face those obstacles no matter how challenging they appear. You have all the tools that you need, and if you have ask for help, it’ll be there when the time is right.

But don’t expect the spiritual path to be a golden paved road with rose petals, chocolate fountains, and all the beer you can drink. It doesn’t work that way. Because we’ve been piling tons of shit on ourselves, and humanity has been piling tons of shit on itself for centuries. The duration doesn’t matter because things can ultimately shift incredibly quickly, but a lot of stuff in this world will still take time. However, you don’t have to wait, nor should you wait for what the “world” may do. You are already at the center of your world; start making changes there.

Accepting What You Are

One of the amazingly sad things is that this world has taught us to play small. It’s taught us to take on roles that are inappropriate to us, and any time we are doing things that aren’t truly in our hearts, we are cut off from other parts of ourselves. That’s how we play small. Playing big has nothing to do with any of the usual measures of “bigness” that are commonly thought of. So, you don’t have to be an international diplomat, president, 100-Meter Gold medalist, or a mother of 8 kids to have a big role. You can be a farmer in the middle of nowhere’s-ville, and if this is truly your passion, you’re playing huge. Because that’s what you are, and in accepting yourself in that fullness, you’re living large.

You may also have a role that isn’t culturally acceptable, such as anyone called to be a dakini or daka–a sexual teacher. That brings it’s own challenges, but by God, we have so much to repair in people around their sexuality. If this is you, you are badly needed. For others, perhaps you know that you’re a great spiritual teacher or leader. You are badly needed. You also don’t have to heal or teach hundreds, thousands, or millions to be a great teacher or healer. You may be called to heal a few. It doesn’t matter so long as you are standing in the fullness of who you are. That’s how you live large, and you can only do it when you accept what you are and the role you’ve chosen to play.

Standing in Your Light Draws Life to You

Initially, things may not flow easily for you. This is often because you’ve got so much inertia weighing you down, and you’ve created so much momentum taking you some place else. You may have years of being a school teacher, but now you’re called to be spiritual community building catalyst. I’m sure that you’ll have been gaining some of the tools that you need for it as a school teacher, but initially job offers and initial ideas may keep trying to pull you back into that old venue. That’s why it’s so important to do the work on yourself to clear away doubts and fears so that you are clear about what it is you are here to do. If you don’t, I’ve noticed that people can talk themselves into going back into that old space because it seems like they’re supposed to. And sometimes they are. We have to learn all the lessons that we need to learn to complete old cycles, but many other times, going back is horribly miserable. Because you’ve let the truth out of the box to yourself, and you can’t live small like that anymore.

More often than not, I’ve seen in my own life and others that as you stand in the fullness of your true self, others get drawn to you to help you do that work. You become this dynamic co-creator of the flow in your life, and you can easily create and change things. Bringing stuff to fruition in your life may have a quality of effortlessness at times, although not always. You are starting to see how amazing it is when you simply are you.

The Old Shell Falls Away

More and more, the light of you will melt the old shell of you away. Sometimes it feels like you need a pickaxe to slough it off, and sometimes you do. But the further you go, I’ve found that there is a great ease and relaxation to being my true self. It’s just what I am, and I don’t work hard at it. How could I? Isn’t that ridiculous? Could you imagine an elephant working hard to be an elephant? Maybe you’re smiling as you read this. But it is important to acknowledge what you are. Stop fighting the fact that you’re an elephant. You can’t be an anteater. It won’t work. It’ll confuse the anteaters, and you really don’t like eating ants anyway, do you? (I have an fun allegory about this in The Tale of the Butterfly for those of you new to the blog). The same goes for the anteater. You don’t have a trunk, and you never will. That’s not what you are. You have a whole other set of gifts that are beautiful that you need to embrace.

Along with acknowledging what you are, you won’t get caught up in trying to be what you’re not. It’s not that you’ll stop trying new things or improving skills (like becoming a better singer), but you’ll understand that you’re not good at math. It’s not in your heart; you’ll get a financial advisor at tax time because that’s that person’s passion. It’s simple really. The world will start to get really simple in some ways when people simply do what they love without all the needless frustration and effort of trying to make themselves into things they aren’t. That struggle simply brings more misery into world, and we’ve all had enough of that.

Where We Are Today: Misery Abounds

But right now, people are bought into lies. They’re bought into a world of made up rules, and they’re bought into lies that tell them that they can’t be what they truly want to be. Many of you feel like you don’t know who you really are, but you do. It’s usually that thing you say, “Well, if I could do anything, it’d be this thing, but I can’t do this because yada yada yada.” And if you’re really confused about what you would do if you could do anything, then don’t you think now’s the time to start figuring it out? It doesn’t matter if you’re 15 years old or 89 years old. You can re-create your life in anyway you want at any time, and you can connect with your true self.

Facing Your Fears and Becoming Your True Self

More often than not, you are avoiding this path being you because you’re afraid. I’m sure many of you have elaborate lies about why you can’t be you. “Oh I have a family to raise; I can’t focus on that.” Seriously? You want to show your kids how to not be themselves? Because that’s what you’re doing. If kids don’t see their parents living their truths, what do you think they’re going to do? There’s so much on the line right now, and there’s no time to waste. Too much blood has been spilled because of miserable people not being who they truly are lashing out at others over the stupidest things like land and money–as if we can take any of it with us.

Can you tell me how I can own land? Sure, you can put a fence around it and give me a deed, but I can’t take it anywhere. The amount of stuff that I can actually carry around is very limited, and the more that I carry, the more burdened I am. Your fears are like that too. They’re more burdens for you to carry to slowly crush the life out of you. And that’s part of why spiritual awakening is so deeply disturbing because many people underneath a pile of misery, lies, and fear get crushed open. Suddenly they have to feel everything including the truth that they have denied their true self their entire lives.

Simplicity Is All That Remains Within

Life is actually simple. And if any of this blog sounds melodramatic, I’m simply showing you a reflection of all the drama that we’ve created. The spiritual path is very much drama-free. It’s about simply being as we already are. We don’t have to turn finding our true selves into a struggle either. We simply start by living consciously in each moment and trusting our hearts. It’s so simple. I encourage you to embrace that simplicity and to embrace the fullness of you. You can do it. You are more than ready to stand in your own light, and the world needs you too.


I'm a spiritual teacher who helps people find freedom from suffering.


  1. It is truly amazing how your posts have seemed to coincide with the things I am learning on my own. Wow. It feels good to know I am not the only one struggling with my identity and fears. I have been very much in tune with my surroundings and emotions lately. An awareness. It is quite beautiful of a feeling to be in a single moment completely aware. Reading this inspires me to pursue art more. I have been considering printing my work and selling them, and also making hemp jewelry. I know that when I have children I want to be home for them and work. Stay-at-home mom who makes art and jewelry, and does hair for fun. lol Sounds like my dream. Thanks Jim for giving me the guidance I need through your words. 🙂

  2. That's great, Ashton. I'm glad that you're having these nice synchronicities with my writing. Enjoy the path to being your true self. As you let go of the old lies, you may be surprised how easy it really is. 🙂

  3. I agree with Ashton 100% – its amazing how this brilliant article coincides with what I am going through right now. Also feels kinda 'weird' how I found this website at the right moment in my life. But then I realise its not weird, because the more I let go and follow my heart and be my true spiritual self, the more good things and happiness I experience.

    Thats what I find a great irony… most of us spend our whole lives trying to fit in or be something beyond what we are and struggle day-to-day. But as soon as we let ourselves go and follow our spiritual path, everything flows easy and life seems alot simpler and more joyous.

    Keep up the great work and brilliant posts.


  4. I love you posts, especially the three on being your true self! What you say may not be what people want to hear, but it's the truth. This post, "Be Your True Self" resonated with me. I remember having to put on a facade at school because I had issues with my aunt and uncle. I didn't get along with my aunt or uncle; we would constantly have arguments with each other, even over the stupidest things. Since I didn't want people at school to know about these issues, I put on that "happy" face as a defense and it was tiring. I really wasn't truly happy living in this situation. I am now realizing this in 2012. I'm really thinking deeply about my life and where I want to go.

    Thanks for all your posts!I haven't read all of them, but I came into this site a few weeks ago.

    Also, have you heard of the spiritual website, Kajama?
    I would like to hear your feedback!

  5. Hey Jim. Thank you for your thoughts and words. In the process of connecting with myself, I’ve had to face my fears and go against my conditioning. It’s been a grueling process of transformation but each day brings a bit more freedom. What you say about ease is something that’s been coming up for me. I decided to go back to school and I'm working hard. I experience a lot of residue and anxiety that gets better with time and healing. Is it really just supposed to be simple and easy when you connect with what’s in your heart? It’s been tough for me. There was a lot of debris in the way. It’s better now and my energy is so much clearer than it was a couple of years ago. But yeah, I’m curious about the ease bit. Thanks so much for your blog; your writing is a source of so much joy, comfort, and discovery.

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