The subject of this spiritual blog post may seem surprising, but it’s a reality for some people. For those who really dissolve away into spaciousness and love, spiritual awakening no longer matters. It simply becomes a past moment that was a gateway to other moments. Kinda like birth.
Being born into our human existence was a really big moment for all of us, but it is not something we rank particularly highly anymore once we’re here. When we’re here, growth becomes everything as we mature into fully functional human beings that can take care of ourselves. In this way, spiritual awakening is similar. The first few years after awakening are often dominated by a drive towards a new equilibrium where we can function from a place of deeper maturity and clarity.
However, unlike the growth of our bodies, moving into deeper states of clarity is not assured. Many people can and do successful fight this inner change, and others partially embrace the inner shifts that arise. This can lead to very strange understandings of truth because of how the idea of truth can be twisted together with human blindspots and pain.
But those of you who do really embrace it, you may find that your spiritual awakening is starting to or no longer matter, and I felt like writing a little bit about that today.
The Loss of the Evaluator
The part of us that evaluates the importance of things, people, and events in our lives is the ego. That evaluator can rate everything from your last romantic partner to the quality of your dinner to your spiritual awakening. Since it is rare that the unconscious ego is thoroughly obliterated after awakening, a person is probably rating their spiritual awakening as a very significant event. As someone grows and changes, this event may continue to grow in importance to the ego as it build a new story about itself.
I should pause to say that a spiritual awakening isn’t an event. It is a timeless space within us. But because of human nature, it seems like an event to let go and see what has been here the whole time. If someone has a lot of blissful feelings, they often label that event as spiritual awakening. But the clarity and love of awakening is always with us. Most people simply don’t pay attention to it. It’s only when we touch that space and the energy of change and growth ignites from that fertile soil does it hold our attention at all.
Now back to the re-building of our ego story post-awakening….
The ego self is constantly interested in defining itself, and so it is very common in the earlier stages of growth and healing to re-define everything in relationship to spiritual awakening. Most people aren’t comfortable with the unknown even though they may have already realized that most of life is completely unknown to us. But as someone matures, more and more of this evaluator dissolves away into the infinite present moment. Without that ability to elevate (or demote) an experience, everything starts to matter much less and that includes a spiritual awakening.
Unobstructed Spiritual Growth and the Loss of the Idea of Progress
A Peaceful Lack of Interest
In a world Hell-bent on goals and buried in interests of all kinds, a person without many if any interests is a rare soul. I should say that this doesn’t mean the person doesn’t know how to take care of him or herself. Having an interest in eating really doesn’t require much mental thought. An urge to eat arises. You eat. End of story.
Rather, most interests are forms of Self-distraction (yes, that’s Self–the true Self–with a capital S). Since being at one with the Self is a truly nourishing and enlivening space, having other interests to make yourself feel good becomes more and more silly. Why go to an amusement park ride when you are already full of amusement with life sitting on your bench in the park? Why go off on another romantic pursuit when love is bursting from your soul? So many interests fall away because they were cover-ups for pain or attempts to feel a certain way. While the spiritual path isn’t about feeling good all the time, people tend to feel way better in general when they are resting in the peace of awakened love. That tends to lead to more and more interests melting away as you relax in divine presence.
Beauty and Clarity Matter and Don’t Matter
As someone continues to mature, beauty, clarity, truth, and love are what matter to them. But they also don’t matter. You see the need to rate and evaluate is going away, so the individual can also be without any focus on these things. When things matter to the ego, they require focus. The ego has to find what it wants–experiences, people, etc. But the true Self can rest in peace with whatever is.
The initial phase of seeking these things out is a common part of one’s growth after a spiritual awakening. These phases tend to be really important to help slough off more ego shells.
But over time, even seeking these things out doesn’t matter. It’s because the inner space already holds them. Finding them in the external world matters less and less, and that original seeking was–as it usually is–simply a way to find what is already inside oneself.
Additionally, the maturing spiritually awakened person has learned that all experiences and parts of this world are sacred. So they also embrace darkness, deceit, anger, hatred, fear, and other things because they are part of the full spectrum of human experiences. These too matter and do not matter as your preferences continue to fall away. They simply are parts of the world and experiences/feelings that come and go like the tide.
Resting in the Bliss of Life
The bliss of life is not an inherently good feeling. It simply is a state of being. Additionally, a lot of the ups and downs that made good feelings distinct from bad feelings tend to go away. There’s a lot of normalizing of experiences and feelings for the matured awakened soul. Consider drinking water for the first time after living on cactus juice in the desert. The experience is probably mind-blowing and exquisite. But if you are now surrounded by clean, drinkable water, then it is no big thing. The water is now a normal experience.
Such is the same with love, truth, and clarity–they become normal parts of life where in the beginning they may have been brand new depending on your life path.
Thus, a spiritual awakening becomes no big deal anymore. It doesn’t matter. It particularly doesn’t matter because the awakened space is always here, and the “event” labelled spiritual awakening is now long gone in the past. Much like birth, it was an important moment, but that moment is gone. The now is what is here. In your wisdom, you know that the only thing was can ever embrace is here and now. And so the past and future do not matter, as one has already disappeared and the other is born through the present anyway. So you simply rest here and now and be in the perfection that you are.
4 Comments
Dear Jim, this was truly helpful to read. Thank you.
Great. Glad to hear it, Taina.
Thanks for this! Your writings speak to me and give me so much clarity. I have spent a long time making things far too complicated. 🙂
You're welcome, Kathryn. Yes, the ego makes a lot of things too complicated. This blog post offers more thoughts on this topic:
Simplicity and Spirituality: The Loss of Ego Complication